Tuesday, 27 March 2007


It was boy #1 's birthday recently, why do we have to have all his wretched mates round, I can't wait til they are old enough to get out to the pub or something. Mind you, they might be OK by then. But now, my God what a set.

There's ****** who I shall call Gollum. He can be relied on want "NEED" any other toy which is being played with by another child. To the point where Gollum can't actually play with any of his hoard as his legs are buckling under the weight of it all. I actually heard him say " they are all mine" in a shrill and disturbing voice.

Then they is ****** who I shall call Pushit. What ever you say he can't do, then that is what he will do. I caught him with a large full water pistol in the kids room. Yes I know it sounds petty, but would you like to get into a wet bed? And this is after he had been told it was an OUTSIDE toy. "Can I just squirt it in the bath then?" Get real, like I'm going to let that happen.

Next up is ****** who I shall call Baby. Yes he's the one who cries to get his way. He cries so easily you almost dare not speak to him. But although it undoubtedly works at home, it won't work with me. He can just cry himself dry. And rally what is the big deal? So someone sat in his place - So?

Finally we have **** who I shall call Whiner. God he is hard work. Loud, unruley, pushy, a bad looser AND a bad winner (dreadful combination). To cap it off, he smells. How does a seven year old get to smell so bad? Don't they wash him?

I could go on, but I think you get the picture.

I can understand why so many parents just don't entertain at home for their kids. No, they ship them off to kiddy world for some hydrogenated fats and a sugar rush, then send 'em back home to mum and dad.

Next year I will suggest a much more select guest list, or perhaps a themed party. Mary Keller springs to mind for some reason.


Bloody Students

Firstly, this is not the obvious post about students in a pub sharing a packet of crisps all night. No, this is a more serious matter for anyone who reads this (I think that's just the two of us then). I refer to the recent phenomenon of students somehow morphing into consumers.

Anyone who teaches will I am sure be familiar with this and those who don't will just have to make the best of it - sorry.

So, there seems to have been a shift in the student community in all areas of FE. At one time, they signed up for the course, either did the the work or didn't do the work, passed or failed and that was the end of it.

Now they sign up PAY THE FEES and then expect to pass the course without any further effort on their behalf at all. Just turning up seems to be optional.

Are we just selecting students on the basis of whether they can pay or not? What happened to having a proper interview to determine how badly they wanted to do the course and learn the content? If they would even bother to turn up?

The module descriptions are clear enough and the students know that a little or a lot of home study is required, according to the nature of the course, but still they piss about and don't listen to the simplest of instruction or bother to even try to understand their part in the learning experience.

When they then fail or are in clear danger of failing, they whinge like fuck that the reason they have failed is the quality of the teaching, the quality of the course materials, their dyslexia, their learning style was not catered for - anything except acknowledging that they were too lazy to actually do the work.

They may as well be honest and just say I should have passed because I PAID!

Well guess what, it doesn't work like that. You have to work too.

Anyone considering doing an FE course and thinking they will pass because they have paid really needs to have a re-think. There is no value in a qualification like that. Anyone can buy one and it becomes a meaningless bit of paper.

You might as well just frame the receipt.


Sunday, 4 March 2007

Sunday Afternoon

I am on my own. That is to say that Mrs B is out and I am at home with #1 and #2. They don't really count as company as they are not adult enough to form reasoned arguments as to why they should only be responsible for getting stuff out and I should be responsible for putting said stuff away.

In the absence of Mrs B, I have made them tidy up some toys. Yes, it felt good acting like my own dad for a while. But then I remembered why I don't speak to my Dad so I have decided to join in with their game which seems to consist mainly of fighting each other.

I don't mind this as I feel that the practice will come in handy as they get older and venture away from Sleepy Hollow, and I could do with the practice too.

Amazing how, with a well timed push, a three year old can send a seven year old flying. This is very "martial arts" style and I am impressed with #2. I tell him and he tries it on me, Judas.